And by fifty, I mean twenty eight- woops! I suppose I just wanted to say "fifty" because it rhymes with "nifty" and reminds me of my favorite educational song "Fifty Nifty United States". Hmm, now I'm lying again. That's not my favorite educational song at all- it's actually "Conjunction Junction, What's Your Function?"- but I do like "Fifty Nifty United States".
I digress. These facts came from topfive.com (sometimes I have to rely on sources other than myself for interesting blog topics- I am not a machine, people!). I am convinced that many of these "facts" are completely fabricated, but decide for youself. I've included my comments in BOLD.
*Johnny Plessey batted .331 for the Cleveland Spiders in 1891, even though he spent the entire season batting with a rolled-up, lacquered copy of the Toledo Post-Dispatch. Um...WHAT?! That's insane- why didn't he use a bat? Why hasn't this received more press? Maybe the Cleveland Spiders were a little league team. But little kids don't read the newspaper....so that can't be it. WOW
*The Boeing 747 is capable of flying upside-down if it weren't for the fact that the wings would shear off when trying to roll it over. I'll believe it when I see it.
*Manatees possess vocal chords which give them the ability to speak like humans, but don't do so because they have no ears with which to hear the sound. Again, I do not think we can make this assumption. How do we know they stay silent because they don't have ears? Maybe they just don't want to talk- like monks. We should really just ask them.
*SCUBA divers cannot pass gas at depths of 33 feet or below. How AWFUL. Makes my stomach hurt just thinking about it.
*Catfish are the only animals that naturally have an ODD number of whiskers. Don't care.
*Replying more than 100 times to the same piece of spam e-mail will overwhelm the sender's system and interfere with their ability to send any more spam. Yeah, and replying to an e-mail 100 times would take forever so I would never do it.
*Polar bears can eat as many as 86 penguins in a single sitting. OH MY GOD! HA! That's a lot.
*The first McDonald's restaurant opened for business in 1952 in Edinburgh, Scotland, and featured the McHaggis sandwich. This is crazy- I thought McDonalds is known for being American. Every time we'd go there in Cyprus our international friends would say "ahh, McDonalds- it's like going home for you, right?" Well, next year when I'm in Edinburgh I will have to try a McHaggis- except I won't because I don't eat meat. But I will watch someone else eat one, how bout that.
*You *can* get blood from a stone, but only if contains at least 17 percent bauxite. HUH?
*The skin needed for elbow transplants must be taken from the scrotum of a cadaver. First of all, gross. Second of all, ELBOW TRANSPLANTS?
*The sport of jai alai originated from a game played by Incan priests who held cats by their tails and swung at leather balls. The cats would instinctively grab at the ball with their claws, thus enabling players to catch them. What's Jai Alai?
*A cat's purr has the same romance-enhancing frequency as the voice of singer Barry White. Ok, who's the crazy cat-lady who discovered all these feline facts?
*The typewriter was invented by Hungarian immigrant Qwert Yuiop, who left his "signature" on the keyboard. Awesome. He should have made himself home row. Maybe asdf ghjkl was his wife or something.
*Because printed materials are being replaced by CD-ROM, microfiche and the Internet, libraries that previously sank into their foundations under the weight of their books are now in danger of collapsing in extremely high winds. Yep- don't believe this one at all. I need to see the research. Cite your source. I smell a rat.
*In 1843, a Parisian street mime got stuck in his imaginary box and consequently died of starvation. Now-a-days we have names for people like the mime- paranoid schizophrenics. Poor, silent, face-painted thing. Tragic!
*Until 1978, Camel cigarettes contained minute particles of real camels. Having ridden a camel, I feel strongly toward this issue. Had they been around back then, the "TRUTH" campaign and PETA would have probably collaborated for one doozy of a television commercial.
*A dog's naked behind leaves absolutely no bacteria when pressed against carpet. DON'T BELIEVE IT. What about that Stanley Steamer commercial? This one:
*Every Labrador retriever dreams about bananas. How could anyone possibly know this? Not to be a sceptic, but come ON.
*If you put a bee in a film canister for two hours, it will go blind and leave behind its weight in honey. WOW! Doing this- next bee I find. Can't WAIT!
*Centuries ago, purchasing real estate often required having one or more limbs amputated in order to prevent the purchaser from running away to avoid repayment of the loan. Hence an expensive purchase was said to cost "an arm and a leg." If only this policy was still intact maybe our current economic crisis could have been avoided.
*Coca-Cola was the favored drink of Pharaoh Ramses. An inscription found in his tomb, when translated, was found to be almost identical to the recipe used today. CRAZY!! I hear King Tut was more of a diet coke man himself.
*If you part your hair on the right side, you were born to be carnivorous. If you part it on the left, your physical and psychological make-up is that of a vegetarian. Let's check- left part, vegetarian- yep, guess this one is true.
*When immersed in liquid, a dead sparrow will make a sound like a crying baby. So it makes the crying noise after it's dead, or while it's dying?
*Although difficult, it's possible to start a fire by rapidly rubbing together two Cool Ranch Doritos. It's probably "difficult" because no one can hold Cooler (they used to be called COOLER Ranch but then it switched to just COOL- I looked it up) Ranch Doritos in their hand for that long without eating them. They are so good. A lot better than Nacho Cheesier Doritos.
*The world's smartest pig, owned by a mathematics teacher in Madison, WI, memorized the multiplication tables up to 12. WHAT?! I only know them up to 11!!
*Due to the natural "momentum" of the ocean, saltwater fish cannot swim backwards. I would never even think to expect them to swim backwards. So, this isn't that cool.
*The "nine lives" attributed to cats is probably due to their having nine primary whiskers. What's with all the cat facts? Some crazy cat-lady has devoted her life to discovering quirky facts about the glorified rodents. Wait- didn't we just find out that catfish are the only animal that have an odd number of whiskers? LIES!
*The Venezuelan brown bat can detect and dodge individual raindrops in mid-flight, arriving safely back at his cave completely dry. This makes me think of Quidditch. For some reason.
Feel smarter? Me neither.
Peaceout,
Madge
4 comments:
Some of these are just WRONG- they have to be. A manatee can speak like a human if only it had ears??? WHAT??? At McDonalds is AMERICAN- McHaggis my arse.
i cant believe i read all those. exhausting! i didnt know cool ranch doritos used to be called cooler ranch. is that true?
Every single fact on that website was made up...1/6 of your life is spent on a Wednesday??? I know for a fact polar bears don't even eat penguins. I just can't believe someone thought that stuff up cause those are weird.
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